2015 Year in Review

Whew. It has been a long long while since I actually blogged. August 2015, to be exact, and it was a recipe. In any case, I had loved my 2014 so much that my goals for 2015 have actually been whittled down to SIX.




Because I am running a video game development studio, I have no choice but to be social, haha. So that's no longer one of my yearly goals. What remained are the following...

Read more »

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

2014 Year in Review

Since whittling down my goals to 8, I feel like 2014 has become one of my best years ever. I mean, sure, it had snags (megalomaniac ex-lessor included), but the rewards tripled after that experience.

I've decided to make my 8 goals permanent every year. They're flexible enough to keep me motivated in reaching them on or before the end of the year. So these are the status of my 2014 goals:


8. Travel at least twice a year. 
Preferably 1 local and 1 international destination.

One of my teams (Project K) and I went to Sagada to do some research for one of our educational projects. It was my first time to go to Sagada and it was loads of fun! Baguio was awesome, too, since we were able to visit Bencab Museum. More of that story here.

For the second out-of-town trip, boyfie and I attended a wedding in Sta. Rosa. Sure it's not really much of a trip distance-wise (since my parents live in Tagaytay), but it's the first time I actually spent a lot of time in Sta. Rosa. The reception of Sajean and Jov were held at the Chateaux de Paris Grand Clubhouse.

Read more »

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Indie Game: Millennium: A New Hope

Where do I even begin raving about this title by Indinera Falls and published by Aldorlea Games? Millennium: A New Hope is yet another RPGMaker game that first appeared in casual game portals like Big Fish Games and then later Greenlighted by Steam. As of this writing, I am patiently awaiting a Steam sale (Halloween?) and the release of the last 3 Millennium titles because right now, only the first two are available on Steam. (It costs $5.99 in Steam, but $9.99 in Desura. Strange.)

Click thumbnails to enlarge images.

Anyway, I was just browsing through Steam and stumbled upon this last week. The story is about a young peasant girl who aims to change her country's leadership. Basically, she goes around looking for strong warriors to champion her cause.

Read more »

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Indie Game: Happy Birthday

I had been looking for short indie games to play to keep me relaxed when so many stressful things are going on. I found Happy Birthday on Steam Workshop while I was at it. Unfortunately, I couldn't understand how to download this gem from Steam (it says "Subscribe to Download" but it did not download when I subscribed) so I ended up going to its RPGMaker.net page and downloaded it from there. It's FREE and is only about an hour long.

 "Happy Birthday" first struck me as a point-and-click murder mystery game but since you're actually controlling a 2D sprite and not pointing and clicking with your mouse, it's considered a visual novel. The premise of the story is that you are an investigator who's out to unravel the events behind the brutal murder of a young girl on the night of her birthday party.

Read more »

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Indie Game: Chronicles of a Dark Lord Episode 1: Tides of Fate

Instead of a title screen, let me start off with a trailer, just to give you guys an introduction to the indie game Chronicles of a Dark Lord: Episode 1: Tides of Fate.



It's ironic that I use RPGMaker (RM) as one of my tools in making games but Tides of Fate is probably the only RM RPG I was able to finish. I've played a lot of RM demos because I truly wanted to support RM users, but many titles (except for brilliant non-RPGs like To The Moon, Ninja Clause and Touhou - Wondering Souls) leave much to be desired. Tides of Fate, despite looking very indie, has a story and soundtrack that enable it to rise above so many generic looking RM games. Let's enumerate why I like this game, shall we?

Read more »

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Raving about Child of Light

(Click photos to enlarge.)

Another long overdue review. Hehe. But I don't really feel so bad since Ubisoft's Child of Light has become so popular for being breathtakingly beautiful. And I mean it in every sense of the word: Child of Light is beauty beyond compare. It's not even just about aesthetics anymore. The story, simple though it may be, and gameplay are just as lovely.

Anyway, just to give you an idea of what this game looks like:

Read more »

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Board Game Testing: Sweet Sabotage

My favorite couple (a team of programmer/game designer and artist), Charles Cue and Ellie Licuanan of White Ravens, came up with a board game that will be due for release on February 2015 and they're currently on Indiegogo for crowdfunding. Just to give you an idea what the board game is all about, here's a YouTube video:

So Charles and Ellie contacted me and our former colleagues and set up a playtesting session at Tobey's Game Café.

Read more »

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Suggested Gifts for the Graduates

March and April are the months when most seniors in the Philippines graduate. Being a part-time faculty for two colleges that both have trimestral schedules, we either have them earlier or much later. In any case, I was asked to check out Lazada's shop to see if I could find ideal gift suggestions.

To be honest, the gifts I picked were ones I actually would like myself. Hehehe, but I'm pretty sure my own students would more or less have the same tastes (since we're all from the video game development industry anyway). So let's start off with the gadget I coveted most:

Samsung Galaxy S4 Zoom C101 Android

I have been eyeing this since it first came out but I had just bought my Note at that time. I tested out its features and can I just say...Wow. I fell in love with it at first handling. XD

Read more »

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Global Game Jam 2014 (At Benilde and Globe Labs)

For this year's Global Game Jam, the Philippines had 4 venues. These were: De La Salle - College of Saint Benilde (CSB) and Globe Labs for Manila, Nueva Ecija and Davao. Saturday and Sunday, I ran from Globe Labs to CSB then back to Globe Labs because my students, co-faculty and colleagues were separated in two venues.

The theme was:

We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are.

Whew! It's probably one of the most profound themes I have ever seen used in a game jam. It would probably take me a day to process it. Like the previous GGJ events, you cannot post about the theme until Hawaii has started because it's going to be the same theme used worldwide.

Anyhoo, let's take a look at what happened in Benilde.

Read more »

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

We Are One: A Seminar for the Benefit of Yolanda Survivors

On December 7, from 9AM to 5PM, there will be a LEARNING event for the benefit of Yolanda survivors. I personally think this is like hitting two birds with one stone: LEARNing more while HELPing others.

Here is the schedule of topics:
09:00am Prayer/ Yoga Exercise
09:15am Session 1 – Resilience Is Not Enough (by Coach Randy Esguerra)
10:15am Session 2 – YES! You Can Inspire As You Live! (by Ricky de Vera, MBA, CSP)
11:15am Session 3 – Creating A Personal Vision: You Can Do It If You Can Perceive It (by Boris Joaquin)
12:15pm Lunch
01:15pm Session 4 – Connecting and Engaging Online (by Janette Toral)
02:15pm Session 5 – Victim s. Responsible Mindset (by Joey Reyes)
03:15pm Panel Discussion (by Gwen Pang, JC Libiran and Pochollo Gonzales)
04:15pm Session 6 – Understanding & Appreciating What Happens To You (by Pido Aguilar)
05:15pm Closing

To learn more about this event, you may simply visit the "We Are One: A Seminar for the Benefit of Yolanda Survivors" website, or click to enlarge the top image.

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Pacific Rim is pure geekgasm goodness

I swear, director Guillermo del Toro never ceases to amaze me with his versatility. This is a funny thought, considering he was also the director of Blade II and Pan's Labyrinth, two movies from completely different genres. Now this.

Ok, forgive me if I won't sound coherent to those who are not fans of Japanese giant robots...

Read more »

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Possible Candy Crush Replacements

Ever since the death of one of my baby projects, Puzzle Pets Adventure, I had been on the lookout for new casual games. I briefly played Candy Crush, a match-3 game, and Rage of Bahamut, which is like a watered down version of Magic the Gathering card game, on my Android gadgets and let's just say, I wasn't too enthusiastic. For Candy Crush, it's the fact that the game is designed to frustrate you enough so that you'd do micro-transactions. (I thankfully never fell for it.) For Rage of Bahamut, I get distracted by the skimpiness of the women's clothing...and that it's heavily unbalanced. I rarely win challenges I did not issue and I end up bullying other players because I know that I'd always win on challenges that I do issue. Bullying anyone is hardly my idea of fun.

I heard about Puzzle and Dragons but it seems to be only available to iOS users or certain Android devices. The search led me to Pocket Monsters: Dragon Rage (PMDR, by Softgames), which seemed like the German son of Candy Crush and Rage of Bahamut. A few weeks later, my friend Rowena introduced me to Tower of Saviors (TOS, by Mad Head Limited), a game that's almost exactly like PMDR except that it hailed from Hong Kong.

I'll put the screenshots of both games side by side while I make comparisons, placing PMDR on the left and TOS on the right. You can click the images for a larger view.

Ok, let me rephrase how I described these two games: PMDR and TOS are like the spawn of Pokemon, Candy Crush, and Rage of Bahamut. Or Puzzle Pets Adventure and Rage of Bahamut, which makes me cry a little because these two are exactly the games I had envisioned developing before I left my last job as a video game producer.

Read more »

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Quality Geek Time at Tobey's Game Cafe

For many board gamers (e.g. table top RPGamers), looking for that perfect place to play board games can be a monumental mission. We've experienced getting kicked out of a food court (because the guard thought we were gambling) and well, just about any other establishment will question your group because board gaming really takes a lot of time. Like 10-12 hours for a large Dungeons and Dragons group.

Imagine staying at an expensive coffee shop from 2PM to 2AM and making a lot of noise because you got so engrossed in your roleplaying. Not only are you going to annoy many people who go to coffee shops for quiet conversation, you're also going to drill a huge hole in your wallet. If you're still in college, that will really hurt.

Enter Tobey's Game Café.

Because it is owned by my former client, Ray de Guzman (who also used to be a producer for Anino Games and has worked for EA), we knew about the soft launch sometime last year. But the café officially launched early this year.

Read more »

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Fully Booked and RCBC Co-branding

I had actually just returned from an event at the Fort. I was invited to the launching of Fully Booked and RCBC's co-branded Mastercard. This card was especially tailored for book lovers like me.

I actually am not much for attending events, but when I saw that it was going to be about Fully Booked, I immediately confirmed my attendance. This was also timely, since I have decided that this year, I'm going to re-focus on this blog's roots: nerd and geek culture. After all, my tag line had always been: "A kikay geek's hobby blog. An absent-minded professor's journal."

Upon my arrival, I was given a pretty press kit with the likeness of the equally pretty credit card printed on it.

This is what book lovers can enjoy, according to the press kit:

"...a 10 percent discount instantly with every purchase at any Fully Booked branch, and get cash rebates of up to 10 percent as well as one free book on early purchases and on their renewal period. Cardholders are even entitled to invites to exclusive events, special sales and new arrivals, discount at partner establishments and an installment option of zero percent interest for big-ticket purchases."

This is also the very first time I've stepped foot in Fully Booked's official events place, Novamobili Flagship Store.

I swear the sight of books...as always, was enthralling. Have I ever mentioned that Fully Booked in Bonifacio High Street is my favorite bookstore in the Philippines? It reminds me so much of Singapore's Kinokuniya. 5 floors full of books. You really can't go wrong!!

Oh and this lovely, former MTV veejay hosted:

Most people my age would remember Sarah Meier as that beautiful, statuesque model who was both witty and charming. (Those were the days when I would still tune in to MTV.) She actually went around and asked people what their favorite books were. I love how soothing her voice was.

Then there were some words from Fully Booked's Managing Director Jaime Daez. Actually, it was a good thing I read the press kit beforehand because the thought that kept deafeningly ringing in my head when I saw him was: "Gosh, he's so young!"

I looked him up and it seems like he founded Bibliarch (that shop that contains hard-to-find books in Glorietta) and what used to be Page One in Rockwell Makati. Anyone who has ever been to Rockwell a decade ago would know what now stands in Page One's place. Yup. It's Fully Booked.

Needless to say, I was inspired. How many people do I know have built successful business empires at 30? (Well, for me, building a 5-story structure full of books is already an empire, hohoho.) I kinda envied him...must've taken a truckload of guts and determination. Most geeks are  contented with just being consumers of books, gadgets and toys while nerds would be happier if they were left alone with their innovative experiments.

Anyway, found some of my old fashion blogger friends (my stylist sister used to tag me along  during fashion bazaars so I knew some of them) and we ended up talking about books. Books. And BOOKS. The discussion covered a wide range: from Angels and Demons to Anne Rice to Ayn Rand...to...ugh, the only book I ever gave up on...50 Shades of Grey. After Twilight, I thought I could read through EVERYTHING. 50 Shades proved me wrong. I actually had a limit.

Ganked this photo from Anagon's Instagram. From left to right: Paul (whom I met just tonight), Aisa Pax and Anagon. I haven't seen these girls in AGES. It was great catching up. :)

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

A great International Women's Day & Month gift

I was one of those people who donated $$ for Anita Sarkeesian's project about Tropes versus Women in video games. For those who have not heard of her, she was one of those women who have been bullied over the internet because she dared speak up about the objectification of women in video games. You can read more about Anita Sarkeesian here.

Yesterday, just in time for the International Women's Day (March is actually International Women's Month), she released the first episode of her series. The video is entitled Damsel in Distress: Part 1 - Tropes vs Women in Video Games.

While very basic, the video provided a rather interesting introduction to female video game characters whose roles had been diminished to damsels in distress over the decades. My gaming geek friends -- many of whom are males -- have discussed this and we do agree that the industry is still rather new and we're stuck in the same clichés that older industries (like film) have also found themselves struggling with when they were starting out.

Anyway, here's the first installment of the series:




Personally, I don't think it's just the representation of women that's problematic. Even men complain about the stereotypes that they're stuck with. I'm more concerned about the decline of innovation in video game content. The tropes she presented are actually just a few of the things that indicate that we're stuck with rehashed themes and we definitely need new content.

But anyway, since it's International Women's Month, I'd like to give this to all of you strong, beautiful women out there. You are unique individuals that can never be encased by tropes.

Happy International Women's Month!! =)

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

10 Reasons Why 2012 Had Been Good To Me

Strange haircuts aside, 2012 was a good year for me. While 2011 was a hellishly wild roller-coaster ride, it prepared me for the battles ahead.  I won most of 2012.  Let me count the ways.

10. Had another cat, the Persian-Himalayan Arya
She's kinda dumb and simple, but isn't she a beauty? Here's a photo of her being groomed by our Siamese cat, Kirara.

9. Short vacations at Boracay and Bataan.
If it weren't for the long travel time between Manila and Las Casas Filipinas de Acuzar...well, I still say the trip was worth it. Especially after seeing the first UP Fine Arts building.

8. Moved to Makati
Not only did this move make it easier for me to get to Makati Medical Center (5 minutes walk), it also assured me that my entire system would get the circulation it needed. All that walking actually helped me overcome an accident (fell off a Greenbelt5 escalator earlier this year).

7. Healthier lifestyle, less hospital visits
Cooked my own baon. Well, it was mostly budget at first, but became a health concern later.

I gave myself a P100/day food allowance and upped it to P250/day when I got promoted and became the highest-ranking Producer at work. One thing about being a Producer and a PhD student at the same time...it made me so much more conscious about my health (more than 3/4th of my net salary went to medical bills!!). I learned how to balance my meals, found ways to exercise (lots of walking), learned how to calculate my liquid intake (3.5-4 liters, mostly water). The routine is still not perfect, but the food experiments have been fun.

6. Released Puzzle Pets Adventure on my birth month

5. Released Grave Mania: Undead Fever on my birthday
It also peaked at #5 in Japan and had a fairly great review rating in the US.

4. Spoke at the Youth for IT Congress
Made me realize how much I missed the academe. I still have stage fright, but knowledge sharing has always been a fulfilling experience for me.

3. Survived game development AND PhD studies
I had been (endearingly) called crazy for doing both at the same time but there were actually many factors that conspired for me to achieve this:

• I had a boss who would bake me goodies all the time. (Pastries are the best stress busters!)
• A super friend who thought I was the smartest pretty/prettiest smart girl he has ever met (di ko na to papakilala sa friends ko, hahaha, lalawak ang coverage, hahahaha!) and rewarded me for it with more stress busters (coffee, cakes, reams of paper).
• A best friend who acted like my personal assistant during critical paper submissions (and lent me her colored laser printer).
• Talented work teammates who never gave me headaches because they didn't need micromanaging.
• Friends and family who never stopped believing in me.
• Have a mother who is also finishing her PhD while working in her industry (so it kinda helped me see that I was not the only crazy workaholic nerd at the Lapa residence).

French macarons perfected by my boss (COO) Michael Carranceja

2. Grave Mania: Undead Fever and Puzzle Pets Adventure WON
Best PC/Mac Game for Grave Mania
Best Browser-Based Game for Puzzle Pets

at the Philippine Game Development Festival 2012. Was told that it was 70% jury, 30% public voting. The 70% was a result of all my teammates' hard work and dedication. Every single one of them had loads of talent, intelligence and resilience. The 30% is probably thanks to my entire family and my teammates' students. LOL.

1. Obtained my PhD in Communication
I am definitely not the sharpest tool in that particular UP shed, but I was cursed with ADHD and was indirectly told by a psychiatrist that this was actually the reason why I had been so focused on getting my PhD.

Told myself that I would graduate in 4 years or less and despite the naysayers in my previous employment (and those who thought that my ADHD would be my greatest enemy), it came to pass. I am thankful for my adviser and critic, Dr. Arminda Vallejo Santiago and Dr. Grace Javier Alfonso, who had both provided valuable readings and insights that have helped me bridge game development (my work) and research (my studies).

Truly, I have a lot to be thankful for this year. (Oooh, and RH Bill had been passed!) Thanks be to God, the Supreme Architect.

What about you? Was 2012 good to you?

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Guardians for October 2012

Wow. Didn't know that the guessing game for this session is going to be slightly difficult. We actually only have one winner because he was the only one who got all three correct. BUT I'm still rewarding two runner-ups for the best captions submitted.

First things first, the identification of the three guardians:

• Charmander from the role-playing game Pokémon
• Om Nom from the casual game "Cut the Rope"
• ZGMF-X10A Freedom Gundam / Freedom / X10A --> this turned out to be the most difficult guardian to identify because it closely resembles Strike Freedom (X20A), whom it preceded. The difference between the two models is that Freedom's HiMAT wings (pictured below) have ten parts/blades/talons(?) while Strike Freedom's wings have eight. Of course, since the Strike Freedom is newer, it is the more powerful mobile suit and all eight parts of its wings are detachable.

And now, the winners:

Captioned by Jonathan Lansang, who guessed all three correctly. He gets Starbucks gift certificates worth P500.

Runner-up Molly Tamola Velasco, who guessed two correctly and also came up with a winning caption. She gets Starbucks gift certificates worth P200.

Runner-up Emiliana Sison, who also guessed two correctly and whose caption wins as well. She gets Starbucks gift certificates worth P200.

For the winners, you can send me a private message via my FB page, Skysenshi's Hermitage. I will ask for your phone number, mailing and email addresses.

Congratulations and I hope y'all had fun with this contest! Thanks for participating!!! =^.^=

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Guess the Guardians for October 2012

I haven't had a "Guess the Guardian" contest like this in more than a year. But last week, I suddenly found that my desk has become a haven for toys wanting some privacy (my door apparently offers them some modicum of protection from people that can't resist their cuteness).

So now that I have a few guardians on my desk, I would like to play this guessing game again.  Here they are:

Let's add a little twist to this game:
Aside from guessing who these guardians are, I would like to see who can come up with the most creative caption for this photo. Place your answers on the comment box below.

The winners will receive gift certificates from Starbucks.  I will announce the top three winners on October 28, 2012.

Here's another photo, in case you guys need a better angle:

Come on! Have fun with me. And lots of luck to those who are willing to guess! =^.^=

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Let the Pinay emerge!

I totally missed the Human Nature Pinay and Proud campaign because I'm currently at my busiest.  I will probably have enough time to get back on track by August. This blog entry is probably the only contribution I can make for this effort. :(

As I was reading through the campaign, I was brought back to the time when I was defending my doctoral dissertation proposal (November of 2011, defended/presented the results in June 2012). My topic is about Filipino Women Social Gamers and my panel members asked me to define the word "Pinay".  Apparently, you have to differentiate these terms because "Filipino Women" could mean something different from "Pinay".  The former exists in reality while the latter is a concept defined by social construction.

Plus, I'm not sure if a lot of women are aware, but I have been wielding my nerdy pen in defense of the Pinay ever since I noticed that the keywords "Pinay" and "Filipino women" seem to produce...less than desirable Google results. While doing my research, I am bombarded with nasty images and descriptions of Filipino women and sadly, a lot of those are from Filipino men who are self-proclaimed geeks and new media practitioners. Tsk. No wonder you cannot walk the streets of Manila without receiving catcalls and whistles. If educated men can openly promote the sexual objectification of women online, you cannot expect the uneducated ones to behave better offline.

Anyway, after reading the campaign, I am suddenly curious as to how our readers would define the word "Pinay". And since it has been months since I've been wondering what kind of contest I could run so I could give away my Human Nature lipsticks, this gives me an opportunity to hit two birds with one stone.

So, in this blog, let us begin to raise better images of the Pinay!

Here's my contest:
In the comments section below, define the word "Pinay". Best answer wins.

Additional points will be awarded to those who like/join Skysenshi's Hermitage FB Page and/or share this blog entry to Facebook and Twitter (of course, please leave the link below your answer as well).

It's that simple. I will pick the best comment on 12 August 2012, at 11:59PM.

Good luck!!


WINNER ANNOUNCED:
Thesa Ursal! Your comment wins. Please send me your name, contact number, mailing address and email via this form: http://www.sarimanok.ph/contact-us/

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.

Becoming a doctor & the price paid for finishing early

I just defended my Ph.D dissertation last Friday, 22nd of June 2012 and the panel passed me.  It's a bittersweet victory, however. There are a lot of things going through my mind and half of it makes me smile, the other half makes me worry.  First, the things that make me smile:

This poster at the UP Film Institute caught my eye while I was waiting for my adviser.  The funny thing was that my critic/reader had just granted me the go-signal to distribute copies of my dissertation to my panel.  In my head, I was already singing:

Unti-unting mararating

Kalangitan at bituin

Unti-unting kinabukasan ko'y magniningning

Hawak ngayo'y tibay ng damdamin

Bukas naman sa 'king paggising

Kapiling ko'y pangarap na bituin

Ok, I was too young to have seen the movie but I do remember the theme song that Sharon Cuneta sang, which was about triumph.  Considering that I finished my course work in two years, took a break for one semester, and then finished the manuscript 6 months after defending the proposal, which I defended 5 months after passing the comprehensive exam...that is pretty fast.  Especially since I come from a university that has been known to cause delays for graduate students. (I had been warned by naysayers, and I said, "Challenge accepted!")  So there's a feeling of pride somewhere in there, that I could actually do this. That despite not being the smartest in class, I had incredible sense of determination (and totally supportive friends) to pull me through.

It came with a price, though.  

That's the thing that makes me worry. I've actually been running on adrenaline and I don't know how much more I can hold on to before my body fully recognizes that it is exhausted. Couple this with the fact that a psychiatrist said that I have ADHD...well, the disorder went on overdrive this past year as I tried to juggle work and school.

Before I left my previous employment and while I was doing the exit interview, the president called me crazy for not going full-time as a Ph.D student. And he was right. Boy, was he so right! No sane person would go into a full-time job (and in game production, to boot!!) while taking that much load as a graduate student.

The result? Weekly visits to the hospital because of:

• Internal Medicine (acid and digestion problems)
• Orthopedic (knee injury, fell off escalator due to inattentiveness)
• Dentist (weakened gums resulting in root canal, not covered by Maxicare)
• Dermatologist (ironically, it was the oft-dismissed "beauty doctor" who told me that I was so stressed that my body's resistance has dropped, making me susceptible to all kinds of bacterial and viral attacks, but the resulting damage is not covered by Maxicare)

Plus the other important things?

• Death of love lives
• Nearly dead social life
• Missing family gatherings and activities

But you know what? Another funny thing is that I don't think it's my studies that have led me to this. I was more stressed as a student when I was still doing my course work because I had to run to UP three times a week after office hours back then. And during the summer of 2010, I had to take ENG 295 everyday, running back to the office at the end of every session.  Now, it's doubly harder, because I had to get into grueling production work in the name of auto-ethnography. (I've come to realize that it is the production work that's killing me, even though I've already dropped all other game dev organizational activities.)

I clearly abused my body and have pushed it to the point of being trapped in this unhealthy routine until I graduate. My mom had been right when she scolded me: I should not have gotten a full-time game industry job while still finishing my Ph.D.

My solution? Eat right, sleep well, and drink lots of water as I try to meet the end of July self-imposed deadline for the revisions. Jennent!

And uh, yeah, those are copies of my dissertation that each panelist has commented on.  The revisions are supposedly minor, but considering that my manuscript is 343 pages long and there are 6 copies of them to go through...whew! Looks like I'll be spending my Saturdays in the UP-CMC library and Sundays writing again.

Wish me luck!  After this, I will do my best to go back to my regular activities...such as blogging.

And to all the aspiring graduate students out there:
PLEASE DO NOT DO WHAT I DID. There's a reason why working students take time before graduating, and that's because your body can only take so much damage. Please listen to it. What use is a doctorate/master's degree if you will only enjoy it for a short time? =P

Like this post? Subscribe to this blog NOW .
Or like Skysenshi's Hermitage Facebook Page for updates, contests and discussions.